Nil Points

So… Athens. My flight was delayed by an hour so by the time I got there, it was too late for me to have the wherewithal (!) to catch the metro, so I went for a cab.
It was not until I was in the cab and on my way that I realised that I had no clue how to say anything in Greek other than thank you, no idea how to read the language, or even how to pronounce most of the letters in the alphabet. The worrying consequences of this revelation were brought to light by my taxi driver announcing that he didn’t speak English and the blank expression he gave me when I gave him the name of my hotel.

Still, despite this we managed to carry out several conversations (I’m not convinced that we were talking about the same topic for any of them and it was around this point when I realised that taking my guide to Athens – probably the only thing I own with any phrase tips in it, in the name of reducing luggage weight - was not a good idea).

But, despite it all, I managed to negotiate a good price AND a receipt, say thank you in Greek to my taxi driver and get to my hotel safely. Well, I say safely…

I found out at my breakfast meeting the next day that in reality I was staying in the red light/drug area of the city. Which is nice.

Anyway, enough of all that. I know what you are really reading for - booty pinching. It turned out that on my first day and the second half of my second day I was shuttled about by car, which meant no street pounding and therefore no booty pinching opportunity.

On the advice of the experts (locals) I was confined to my hotel in the evening unless otherwise accompanied. So I did go out on my spare evening – but was accompanied by a man (oo-er – but hang on – before you get before yourself and start thinking this means increased booty pinching – he was our business partner in Greece – therefore strictly no booty pinching). And thus my booty pinching potential overall was reduced by the accompaniment of said gentleman.

Oh alright, I’ll stop with all this verbosity and just get down to results:
Booty pinches – nil.
So clearly I was right with my assumption – difficult to miss, not so easy to pinch. I should be officially disappointed with myself and retire into a corner – booty first – and not come out again until I have polished up my general attractiveness to booty pinching Greek men. And I have a year to do it – as I will be back in Greece in a year and will be going with the intention of increasing my booty-pinch-count.

(Although in my defence, I didn’t see any booty pinching going on in the streets of Athens. None, zip, zilch – so come on, give me a break).

Oh - and another thing - I have taken a steep downturn in health and am therefore having to forego this evenings Booty Shaking Class.

Oh - and another final thing - yes - this word "booty" is beginning to annoy me now too - I'll give over with all this bootying in situations other than those involving dancing.