Consumer Taste Test Extrordinaire

Right, so I am not working today. I have checked what's on the telly and have discovered that if I so desire, I can do a grand chat show consumer taste test. Yes, I have worked out that between when I got up and half nine and the end of what I have decided to be my consumer tester working day, by channel hopping, I can spend the full seven and a half hours until 5pm watching chat shows.

Are you at home today? Would you like to join me on the almighty chat show comparison mission? Then why don't you? Here is the timetable:

09.25 - 10.30 - The Jeremy Kyle Show - ITV1 (which I'm afraid you've missed now - however not to worry - as we will return to him later for further viewing)
10.30 - 11.30 - Trisha Goddard - Channel 5
11.00 - 12.00 - Jerry Springer - LivingTV (I will allow you to choose which you will watch - Trisha or Jerry for that last half hour. And don't feel grubby if your decision is to go with Jerry - there is nothing noble in going for Trisha under the guise of it being more high brow. I have watched a few of these shows in my time - and you'd be wrong to assume that Trisha is more intellectual than Jerry - despite the fact that the audience and guests have the ability to keep their clothes on on the former show)
12.30 - 13.30 - Maury - LivingTV
13.00 - 14.00 - Dr Phil - LivingTV2 (I have never watched Dr Phil before, however I have seen Maury before. Therefore for the sake of a fair experiment - and so that I can say I gave Dr Phil a fair chance - I shall be going with the Dr Phil option during the half hour cross over - in addition to which, we will have the opportunity to return to Maury later if we so choose)
13.30 - 14.30 - The Jerremy Kyle Show - ITV2 (see - told you he'd crop up again - and this gives you the option of skipping Dr Phil altogether - but I'm afraid I'll have to disclude your results from the final findings if you do - on the basis of you having completely by-passed one of the test shows)
14.30 - 15.30 - The Jerremy Kyle Show - ITV2
15.00 - 16.00 - Maury - LivingTV2 (although I'd only allow this a 10 mniute slot - which you may wish to use for a tea break instead)
15.40 - 14.25 - The Ricki Lake Show - ITV2 (I would suggest, similar to the Dr Phil episode, that you take the opportunity to watch Ricki here rather than either of the other two which cross over - for the sake of fair testing)
16.00 - 17.00 - Jerry Springer - LivingTV2
17.00 - onwards - retire to bed, have a good long think about how you have wasted your day, what you should have been doing instead and perhaps have a little cry about those seven and a half hours you've spent listening to other peoples' crazed problems and how you'll never get that time back.