How To Have a Healthy Breakfast

This morning's breakfast experience was second to none, and went a little something like this:

Put bread in toaster not noticing black furry mold waving at me from the bottom of the bread to save it from toaster burn.
Get jam out of cupboard.
Open jam.
Notice little white bits of mold growing on top of jam.
Scrape top layer of jam into compost recycling.
Jam = as good as new.
Promise self will store jam in fridge from now on.
Toast pops up.
Spread with marg and jam.
Bite into toast.

Moldy toast with moldy jam. Dee-licious.
(Spit out, start again).