Tip

If you are feeling a bit grumpy and or lumpy, may I suggest that you do NOT go and try swimming costumes. I did so yesterday, despite having already had a bad day for other reasons. The experience was entirely unpleasant. I wriggled my way into a red costume then turned to look at myself in the mirror. Oh. My. God.

My whole body was struggling to escape, as I breathed in and tried to keep it inside the costume. And it appeared no amount of leg crossing or knee bending would disguise the bulging of my escaping thighs.

The upside of the whole event is that I do not need to go swimming any more – and if I do, I will make sure that I go in a black swimming costume, which extends itself from my neck to my knees. (Reason I do not need to go swimming is that I don’t have a costume – however this does not excuse me from running – which I now need to do in earnest - ugh).